The Grandest Epiphany, pt 1: The Flickering Candle Gestured in a New Day (Skylight)

As I discussed with my good friend PGuy the other day, I had an epiphany last week. I was driving in my car with my ipod on shuffle, and a song by The Armada came on.

They are the new band by former Tea Party frontman Jeff Martin. When he disbanded the Tea Party a few years ago without notice to his bandmates, he released a solo album, and then realizing his mistake and bridges burned, put together a new band called Tha Armada, which is essentially The Tea Party with different people, making the exact same kind of music that he left the Tea Party to get away from.

Now, I have admittedly been a Tea Party fan over the years because of Jeff Martin's guitar work, but the epiphany was as follows: I can no longer stomach Jeff Martin's pseudo-gothic-incantation-lyrics and middle-eastern-blues infused musical masturbations.

"silence swimming in a pool of dreams, beneath its depths the forgotten streams above, the city of the evening star behind its walls, the grand bazaar, as she walks through its endless maze, cursing those who mistrust her ways, please my friend no matter what she sees tell my lover come back to me"

Umm...Jeff? You're from Windsor, Ontario, not Bangladesh or Islamabad. There are no bazaars, camels, purveryors of absinthe, witch doctors or dark forces. There's a homeless guy with a lazy eye panhandling to get some money for a bottle of Boone's. Write a song about that. Maybe the air smells like feces from the Detroit automakers...weave some magic.

The multitude of rare and exotic stringed instruments featured on your songs is tiring. As a young adult I was impressed by the ability to incorporate a 7-string egg slicer solo into a cheese grater ensemble, backed by Tibetan monks robe-muffled farts, but now...not so much.

I'm sorry...but I cannot take you seriously any longer. You have run your course. I am no longer a 22 year old university student trying to find meaning in your mystical meanderings.

Insert Witty Title Here

Had a bizarre, completely unintentional 6-degrees of separation movie incident tonight. Decided I wanted to finish watching a classic, and catch up on a couple of funny movies I've been hearing about.

Finished watching Swingers, which I dug out of the vault last weekend. Of course, Swingers features Jon Favreau/Vince Vaughn (both much skinnier than their current selves) and also a smaller part by Heather Graham. There is one important scene in the film when Jon Favreau's character is awkwardly leaving phone messages for a girl he met at a bar.

Next, I watched The Hangover, which had a small part in it with one Heather Graham.

Finally, I watched I Love You Man, which has Jon Favreau playing a small part, and the main character in the movie, akwardly leaving phone messages for his man-date, as he searches for friends.

Totally coincidental. Totally Krossed Out.

Hilarious

http://antiduckface.com/

Sigur Rós

Why did I wait so long to start listening to Sigur Rós? Their music is beautiful, and their videos are stunning. I had seen the video for "Untitled #1" a few years ago, but never paid much attention after the fact. Took some time this weekend to explore their music and I am hooked. Check these out...a definite trip across the emotional spectrum. Amazing.

Sigur Rós - Glósóli
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=doc1eqstMQQ

Sigur Rós - Hoppípolla
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_EyI4p0yjDQ

Sigur Ros - Untitled #1 [aka vaka]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P0AZIFmkogY

Lyrical Craft

After their blip on the North American radar a couple of years ago thanks to Chasing Cars being featured on Grey's Anatomy, I briefly got into Snow Patrol's music. Chasing Cars was a great song, heartfelt and melodic. At some point last year, I heard the single "Take Back the City" from their cd "A Hundred Million Suns", which is a great tune. It was only recently though that I gave the entire cd a start-to-finish complete listen. In fact I probably listened to it 10-15 times in a row as I muddled through paperwork.

As a musician and overall fan of music, I get excited by people that care about their music and show some form of sincere passion in its creation. I watched a concert clip/interview with frontman/lyricist Gary Lightbody and he described how overwhelming it was to see thousands of people singing their hearts out to a song he wrote by himself in the dark, and that it was all he could do to not cry. In fact, his eyes watered as he spoke about it. This is a person who cares about his craft, and it's coming from a place other than money. The album "A Hundred Million Suns" is a real cohesive piece of work from the first track to the 3-part closer. And while I find the music to be dynamic and interesting, it's Lightbody's ability to express things in such a powerful and refreshing way, that has me really hooked on the band, and cd in high-rotation.

*nb. Peter Guy, please refrain from any and all references to previous musical claims I have made. I was young/naieve.

"The Space Age"

I was just watching a few minutes of a tv show where they show how things are made, appropriately titled "How It's Made". This episode was showing the construction of hearses, fun I know. Anyway, the voice-over woman said the side panels were constructed from carbon fiber and "space age" materials. This left me to wonder, what exactly, makes this material "space age". Is the term being used a little too loosely? Unless hearses are getting their parts from Nasa, I hardly think it's appropriate to call special order parts from Canadian Tire, "space age". Unless it's really advanced stuff that makes the hearse invisible, travel through time, and/or survive re-entry after zipping around the galaxy, I hardly see the need. If two guys in some wood shed are bolting it on, it's probably not cutting edge.

Haven't we been in the "space age" for a couple of decades at least? Couldn't I call anything "space age" if that's the case? "I love my new car! I opted for the 6 cd changer and the space age ipod charger, and the space age heated seats. It costs a little more, but I'm worth it."

And Iran, Iran So Far Away

Couldn't resist the Flock of Seagulls reference.

As the events in Iran unfold, and Iran accuses western influence on the unrest in the country, I can't help but think of a book I read last summer: The Shock Doctrine by Naomi Klein.

The Shock Doctrine follows the application of these ideas though our contemporary history, showing in riveting detail how well-known events of the recent past have been deliberate, active theatres for the shock doctrine, among them: Pinochet’s coup in Chile in 1973, the Falklands War in 1982, the Tiananmen Square Massacre in 1989, the collapse of the Soviet Union in 1991, the Asian Financial crisis in 1997 and Hurricane Mitch in 1998.

In particular, the book notes how in the past, the U.S. has been the puppeteer in staging coups in other countries in order to unseat an unfavourable leader or government. It makes you wonder how much the U.S. might be fanning the flames of protest to get rid of Ahmadinejad. The CIA admittedly has covert agents in Iran and it just seems like this is a convenient opportunity for the U.S to create change in Iran by getting rid of Ahmadinejad.

Food for thought.

Read the book, it's an interesting read.

Public Pools

Took my daughter to the wave pool yesterday as part of our Father's Day festivities.
I'm not a huge fan of public swimming pools, and this experience only cemented that tendency. Of note:

1)To the teens/adults congregrating in the heated hot tub/pool section, the warm water and smell of chlorine is apparently an aphrodesiac that awakens their nether regions and roaming hands, because several handsome couples decided this public venue was a great place for them to grope each other and have a pretty serious makeout session. I threw up in my mouth a little each time that these productive members of society locked in their douchebag embrace.

2)The general level of douchebaggery in the pool. The chap sporting the faux-dogtag necklace (methinks someone spent $50 or more at Randy River recently), the girl with mall-bangs and "Tamara" tattooed across her midsection. The guys walking around like hard-rocks, demonstrating their dominance over the families and children splashing in the water.

Monkeys + Xanax = Not A Good Idea

Since I obviously have had nothing to say recently, have a look at this story.

From the WTF files....

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/northamerica/usa/4694820/Chimp-attack-Owner-denies-giving-Travis-Xanax.html

Some take away lessons:

1. Despite our firmly-seated beliefs, feces throwing is not the only reason monkeys don't make a great pet.

2. The manufacturers of Xanax will probably get sued for not detailing the possible contraindications of giving Xanax to your pet chimp in the fine print. ie. "Use caution when operating a motor vehicle. Do not use alcohol while taking this medication. Do not give this medication to a chimpanzee, lemur, or rhesus monkey without a prescription. Preliminary studies indicate that it is ok for orangutans, as the only noted side effect is an increase is lip flapping and funny face making, which is hilarious."

3. Chimps are tough mofos! Screw the UFC, bring on the new MMMA (Mixed Monkey Martial Arts).