Ha Ha Ha

As much as it would suck to be in this guy's shoes....you can't help but laugh at his stupidity, and lack of error-checking methods to prevent it from getting this far.

http://edition.cnn.com/2006/WORLD/europe/12/29/germany.tourist.reut/index.html

Santa

Happy Holidays everyone! As a parent, aside from the typical joys of Christmas presents, rosy cheeks and hot chocolate at this time of year...it sure is nice to have Santa in your back pocket. In fact, one might even surmise that Santa was purely a product of parental control. However, you play the card...it has significant power. Kid not eating their broccoli? "I'm calling Santa". Problem solved. If only this power persisted throughout adulthood. Not getting enough action? "I'm calling Santa!".

Well, enjoy folks. It is a balmy 4 degrees here in O dot, and I just finished putting air in my daughter's bike tires...hard to believe for Dec 24th. It looks more like October.

Timbaland

Is it me..or does this cat have his hands in everything these days? Seems like everytime I turn on the tv, there he is..clapping his hands or holding it down for JT, Nelly Furtado, or a host of others. Don't get me wrong, this guy is a talented producer (n.b. My use of the word talent may be marred by previously associating the word with the not-so-power-group Wave about 5 years ago...we all make mistakes). Shouldn't we all have a little Timbaland time? I mean, who couldn't use some phat beats and comic relief at their next business meeting? "I'd like to share the projections for third quarter profits...." to which Timba pipes in with, "Take it to the chorus!". Everyone has a great laugh, someone pops the Cristal, and things progress from there.

This cat is everywhere...check out the photos above, from Guy-graduation and the 2006 Saranac trip.

Pffffffffffffffffffffft

One of the occupational hazards of working in education is in the invariability of occasionally walking into little bundles of flatulence that lurk around every corner, left there by the little cherubs with whom we work. Like a warm spot in a pool, they lay there...amorphous gas clouds...until "Pfffft". The kids leave to go home, you go to wipe the blackboard "Pfffft!"...You walk across the room to answer a question, "Pfffft!"..you turn to retreat: "Pfffffft!!!!!".

They are out there...everywhere and anywhere. Waiting. Smelling.

dooflacimehc

There is one person in the world who will find this funny:

http://www.scouter.com/archives/Scouts-L/199506/1265.asp


I've never tried the water rockets that have been posted, but we'd had
great success with YOP rockets. (YOP is a yogurt drink that comes in a
small plastic bottles with tight fitting caps). We've had a lot of fun
launching these rockets in our group. (Sorry Rod - these rockets aren't big
enough to tie cubs to!!!!)

How to Build and Launch a Yop-Rocket

To Build a rocket

1) Get a YOP bottle from the nearest store. (YOP is a yogurt drink and it
can be purchased almost everywhere you can buy yogurt)

2) Clean off all the labels and wash it out well

3) Decorate it anyway you want (put wings on it, colour the bottle, etc)

To Launch a rocket
NOTE: STAND BACK WHEN LAUNCHING THIS ROCKET - It goes up fast and strong

1) Put some vinegar into the bottle (About 1 1/2 to 2 inches is enough)

2) Wrap a tablespoon of baking soda inside a single sheet of toilet paper.
The rocket works better if you only use a single layer of toilet paper
(single ply)

3) Put the wrapped baking soda into the cap of the YOP bottle The wrapped
baking soda should be big enough to just fit inside the depression in the
lid.

***** Steps 4,5 and 6 have to be done quickly *****

4) Pop the cap back into the bottle The tighter the better. If the baking
soda is the proper size, it won't fall into the vinegar when you put the
cap down.

5) Put the bottle on the ground with the cap side down

6) STAND BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

7) Clean up the remains of the toilet paper

How does it work?

The baking soda and the vinegar combine to form carbon-dioxide gas. This
gas builds pressure inside the YOP bottle until the seal on the cap can no
longer hold. At that time the cap pops off and the escaping carbon-dioxide
pushes the rocket up into the air.

Wrapping the baking soda in the toilet paper slows down the reaction
because the vinegar has to soak through the paper to get to the baking
soda. This gives you time to put the rocket down and stand back.

KAA (Gary Stedman), 75th Midnapore Scout Group, Calgary Alberta Canada

Wish List

I'm too lazy to figure out how to use the del.icio.us wishlist as P Guy did on his blog, so here's the gist of my holiday wishlist:

1. Debt relief. More money. A miracle. Something. This sucks.
2. A good pair of studio monitor speakers so I can start using Cubase and recording some music.
3. An electronic drum kit (a nice entry level Roland kit would be nice). Not really a drummer, but I would like to take it up, and it would help with #2 (above, not the #2 that refers to bathroom activity...although sitting on a drum stool could get things going I suppose).
4. A good quality instrument recording mic.
5. A bass guitar.
6. For all the children of the world to hold hands and sing in perfect harmony (to the tune of "It's Getting Hot in Herrrrrre").
7. Boxes of guitar strings.

I could go on....

Bluetooth

This has been in my thinkabouts for a while..but it's time to finally say it. I frikkin hate bluetooth cellphone headsets. Listen, if you are some high-powered exec jet-setting around the globe, I get it. But if you are some tubby, beef-jerky-buying 40-something with hightops and acid washed jeans at Costco on a Sunday afternoon...then I doubt anyone needs to get in touch with you that badly, let alone with something important enough that you needn't be entangled in a traditional earbud (not much better) or have one of your hands tied up holding the cell phone to your ear. Is it a repetitive strain injury from being so bizzay? "My doctor wrote me a prescription for Bluetooth because I have been getting a lot of calls from my shorties". I'm sorry, but you are not that important. Cell phones should be heard and not seen. So, stuff it in your pocket and trash the headgear, and why not the handsome leather cell holster on your belt. Seriously.

What Ever Happened to?

The man they called "Reveen"? Seriously, who doesn't remember the odd radio and tv ads for this weirdo "impossibilist", coming to a venue near you back in the 80's?

I just remember he always creeped me out. Maybe it was his dramatically intense glare, his velvet smoking jacket and scarf, or the rigid pompadour that adorned his skull.

A little web search did bring up the interesting similarity between Reveen and Ricky from Trailer Park Boys, as this has even apparently been a subplot line of the show. You decide...

Coughing, 2006-Style

Just saw a news report that put the kibosh on the standard "cover your mouth" when you cough. Apparently, the medical profession's new darling is coughing or sneezing into your sleeve, thus preventing the spread of germs via your hands. This included a hilarious clip of some chap walking towards the camera coughing away, and alternating coughs between each of his sleeves, but it ended up looking more like a classic bicep kiss. The possibilities are hilarious...not only will paisley print make a shocking comeback to mask our sleeves covered in phlegm and snot, but offices and workplaces around the world will be filled with whispers of narcissism as Steve stands by the water cooler, giving some love to his biceps.

Aziba 2: Electric Boogaloo

About a month ago, we got our daughter a female betta fish. However, she has been sluggish lately, and has developed some sort of wonky eye (technical fish-med term of course). So, sensing the inevitable, I decided to be proactive and replace the ailing Aziba, with a new and improved, albeit male, model (comma intended to diffuse any potential misunderstandings re: male model...he is a handsome fish, but not that handsome). So, rather than having my kid undergo the misfortune of finding Aziba teets up in the tank, I figured giving her the heave-ho would be a better option. So, in comes Aziba 2, and out goes Aziba..into the turlet. A had a few pangs of fishocide guilt as she swam around in the pisser, but it was short lived because before I knew it, she took it upon herself to swim down into the unknown, never turning back, not even to give me the one-fin salute. Godspeed Aziba.

Ye Olde Apothecary

I spent a solid hour and a half last night waiting at the pharmacy for a prescription. Don't get me wrong...I realize these guys/girls are slinging pills, and errors can be deadly, BUT, when your prescription comes packaged in a box, why the delay? Your neatly scrawled prescription says, "Give this guy months worth of these pills"...and the pills come in one month boxes..so, it seems like a matter of putting 2 boxes in a bag, double checking to make sure it's not horse tranquilizers, and away I should have gone. I would understand if it was the old days and the guy was breaking a sweat with his mortar and pestle, grinding me up some tiger scrote and eye of gnewt, but c'mon.

The extra time at the pharmacy had an added benefit of giving me some browsing of their wares. Of note:

- cartoon character "Arthur's" Vitamin C with Ester-C! All of his friend's bathed in a sickly orange hue, Arthur is now whoring himself out to Ester C.
- CHASER, anti-hangover pill. Instructions, take 2 pills with first drink and 2 pills every 3 hours while you continue to drink, to a maximum of 8 pills. OK...so 2 pills, + 2 more (3 hours have passed), + 2 more (6 hours have passed), + 2 more (8 hours have passed) = your daily ration of 8 pills. However, if you have been drinking nonstop for 8 hours, I don't think these little gems are going to help you. A Tranzene taper at your local hospital crisis unit might be a bit more fitting.
- WTF is up with red pens? Why is it that 2 red pens cost $1.29, but you can get 12 black/blue pens (with a bonus red) for $1.49? Is red ink that much more expensive, or is it just proof that your mistakes in life will cost you? "Well, I was going to mark these questions on your test wrong because you failed horribly, but things are tight these days and all I had was a blue pen, so A+!!! Good on you!"

Douchebags

Call it a talent, maybe a curse...but I can spot a douchebag from a mile away. I was walking my down the street today with my kid, and we passed this guy walking with a laughable strut that belied his ponderous nature. He's chugging away on a bottle of fruit juice, tipping his head back to get every last drop of it's sugary goodness. His man-boobs strained against the wafer-thin cotton of his white novelty t-shirt as he clutched a pack of smokes in his hand...heading home with his bounty of nicotine. I turned as he walked past, as I had a suspicion that this guy was a class act, and sure enough as he polished off his bottle of juice, he simply tossed it onto the grass and kept on walking.

This is the same type of character as the creeps that live two doors down, with their 3 Rottweilers, who track back from the grocery store with the cart and leave it parked in front of their house, only to later move it to the parking lot for someone else to deal with. Cripes. Seriously, take a few minutes out from yelling at your wife and delinquent kid to spend the $10 to get a little grocery cart. You may not own your house or care about the value of the property, but I own mine, and your southern-culture-on-the-skids lifestyle is bringing me down.

Where did the summer go?

Cripes...tomorrow is the first day of school. It was the summer that wasn't, really.

Happiness is....

No, it is not a warm puppy. I just had some time to kill downtown, so I went to Steve's music, which is like a candy store to me. I spent a good hour trying out some expensive guitars, etc. Sounds weird...but this is a rarity for me. I spent the majority of my free time as a teenager involved in music, so it is a bit nostalgic for me to hang out at a music store. Life's responsibilities take hold, so even a mundane event like buying new guitar strings and picks for the first time in a year is exciting. I have a few things on my wish list for when I finally get that permanent teaching gig (which = the money necessary to indulge my hobbies), so it was nice to check out the gear. I know P Guy is always on my case about getting my music going...but money and time seem to be continuous obstacles. On my list:

1. more guitars....you can never have enough. A nice Les Paul, a PRS, and an Ernie Ball AXIS would be nice.

2. A new amp. I have had the same amp nice I was 15...time for a change.

3. Electronic drumkit...these are awesome. Seriously.

4. Recording monitors for making music on my PC.

Since You've Been Blitzed

OK, OK...it's been a while since I had something to say, but check this:

Here's the scenario. There is a popular 80's metal cover band in LA called Metal Skool, which pokes fun at that era of music. Apparently, in attendance at one of their recent shows in LA, was the one and only Kelly Clarkson. She was hanging with the singer of Yellowcard, and more than a little lit up. Anyway...the band sees her in the audience and gets her and Yellowcard boy up on stage. Next thing you know, after several allusions to sexual acts involving her, she is chugging Chivas Regal from the bottle and belting out Sweet Child O' Mine. And thanks to modern technology, you too can witness this car wreck:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h4sJMcgeDe0

Imogen Heap

Have been meaning to post about this for a few days. I love it when I serendipitously discover great new music. I was listening to galaxy digital cable radio last week when a track called "Hide and Seek" by Imogen Heap caught my attention. Beautiful harmonies, cool arrangement. I jotted it down for future listening. Anyway, the whole cd, called "Speak for Yourself" is fantastic! If you are going to give it a quick sampling, I would recommend you check out the track above, "Clear the Area" or "Headlock". This girl has got some great vocals, nice samples, and some tight tracks. I love it.

If you want to sample the cd...visit the album player:
http://www.imogenheapmedia.co.uk/audio/player/player.html

http://www.imogenheap.co.uk/

The Origin of the Species

If you have ever wondered where I got my tight dance moves, you may want to view this clip (and it is not the evolution of dance video that is making the rounds...this is strict b-boy style that you all know and love).

http://www.pistolwimp.com/media/48411/

Big Props

All my usual tomfoolery aside...it is time I give my boy P W Guysome serious props on his graduation from INSEAD in France. Despite his devil-may-care attitude and reckless disregard for norms of publicly appropriate behaviour (ie. "J'aime les Grecques!!!!!!")...Guy's ability to set his sights high, buckle down and hit the books always amazes me. By all accounts, this was a tough program to get into and an even tougher program to finish...especially given his penchant for duffs, sauce, grapes, ballyhoo, and even hullaballoo for that matter.


That said, I raise a glass to Guy. (Now give me some money, you soon-to-be-six-figure-making-bastard). I am looking forward to a position in Guy's company as the director of employee certifications, as I am not shy to get certified in a variety of useless skills.

Cheers,

Dopolis

What the hell....

What the hell is up with this...(note my lack of a question mark..as I am using a franco keyboard and it is driving me crazy)

From the CNN website:

http://www.cnn.com/2006/WORLD/africa/07/07/cameroon.breastironing.reut/index.html

Worried that her daughters' budding breasts would expose them to the risk of sexual harassment and even rape, their mother Philomene Moungang started 'ironing' the girls' bosoms with a heated stone.

Vapid

I don't know if you have ever wasted seconds of your life actually attending to what Paris Hilton has to say about anything...but it just happened to me and all I can say is:



=

How's Your Day?

I thought I may have been on a roll...apparently not. After securing a great temporary teaching gig for next year at a great school, I got a call for a permanent teaching gig at another school...used my connections to up my chances...however, didn't get it. When 500+ apply for a job...it's like walking a tightrope with bomb on your back trying to be the person who gets it. Sad state of affairs, but true.

So, I just found out I didn't get it. Too bad. There is a bit of a dichotomy here...whereby you need experience to get the jobs, but you can't get consistent experience until somebody gives you a job...in the interim you are falling into financial ruin.

OH..and it's 7pm and I still can't pick up my kid from her daycare because someone on the street has barricaded himself inside while about a kazillion police officers and tactical officers surround the area. Good times. She doesn't mind though. Her words, "I'm watching MADAGASCAR!".

Perils of Children

You often hear parents talk about childproofing their house...making sure medicine is locked away in cabinets, sharp objects out of reach, pots and pans away from curious hands.

but...what about the perils that parents face in their domestic cohabitation with children? This is often portrayed as the skateboard at the bottom of the steps..but it is no laughing matter.

Living with an almost-4 year old...I gotta tell ya, it's a jungle out there. Kids have their stuff everywhere! This thought came to me as I walked past the dehumidifier this morning, and was almost pulled down by the curved handle of a Barbie stroller which conveniently tucked itself into my pocket as I strode by.

This is not the first time...life with kids is wrought with danger. Sharp toys thrown recklessly in your direction, random inadvertent punches in the sack, stickers stuck to everything, all the while Barney or some other children's cad drones away in the background.

It's tough out there...stick together.

We've All Got Stories

In the news this week: http://www.local6.com/news/9290536/detail.html, the headline reads:

Baby Born With Third Arm

SHANGHAI, China -- Doctors in Shanghai on Tuesday were considering surgery options for a 2-month-old boy names Jie-Jie born with an unusually well-formed third arm.

We all know someone who boasts about having a 3rd leg, so maybe he hasn't been lying all these years. Maybe Jie-Jie and the Blond Cobra have more in common than we would think!

Sarsely.

Home Depot

Was at Home Depot yesterday. Since buying a house two years ago, I have come to love this place and all things in it. It's like that primal male urge to build things (and fight, and have sex, etc...the latter two not-so-much welcomed at your friendly neighbourhood Home Depot). Bought some tiles for the front entrance, and some shite to help install the AC...the annual ritual I loathe. Can't stand it.

As I stood in line at the cash, I noticed the brightly coloured measuring tape that ran up the wall. This thing runs about 15 feet up the wall. Two theories, 1. this is used to measure oversize items and pieces of wood,etc. (insert P Guy joke about measuring wood here) OR 2. Home Depot has recently fallen prey to a string of robberies at the hands of a roving band of giants, and the strip is much like those seen at your convenience store to put a height ID on bandits on their way out the door.

It's gonna be another scorcher today...like 32 degrees. Good times.

David Lee Idiot

Not that many of us ever thought differently, but former Van Halen frontman/Howard-Stern-replacement, David Lee Roth is not that great with words. Saw an article in the news today, with DLR's insightful comments about the inevitability of a Van Halen reunion, including the following:

"To me, it's not rocket surgery. It's very simple to put together. And as far as hurt feelings and water under the dam, like what's-her-name says to what's-her-name at the end of the movie Chicago - 'So what? It's showbiz!' So I definitely see it happening."

1. Rocket surgery?! Yes, you're right it's not rocket surgery...because the occupation of Rocket Surgeon doesn't exist.

2. Water under the dam?! Argggggh. Moron. Dams restrict the movement of water, including the movement of water "under" them.

Sorry...but I have a hard time with misuse of idioms.

Ughhh

Have never had problems with allegies before. Today...I have been a sneezing runny- nosed bastard.

On the lighter side of things, I am happy to say that none of my friends have a mustache.

If they did...it might look something like this:

Sketchup

Google has launched a free Beta version of their Sketchup software, and it is pretty damn cool.

Google SketchUp (free) is an easy-to-learn 3D modeling program that enables you to explore the world in 3D. With just a few simple tools, you can create 3D models of houses, sheds, decks, home additions, woodworking projects - even space ships. And once you've built your models, you can place them in Google Earth, post them to the 3D Warehouse, or print hard copies.

And, to keep in line with my usual take on things, I wish to banish the following groups of individuals from my neighbourhood:

1. People with loud, obnoxious dogs.
2. People with #1, and loud obnoxious children.
3. People with #1 and #2, and loud obnoxious spouses.
4. People who take the shopping carts home from the grocery store.
5. People who walk their cats...on a leash...seriously.

Feck

Had the pleasure of having an Upper GI test this morning. Holy feck...here's the rundown.

1. Drink two huge glasses of barium sulfate (read: two big glasses of a foamy mess with the consistency and nutritional value of drywall paste)
2. Resist the urge to vomit.
3. Proudly display two empty cups, then proceed to crush them on my forehead, while shouting "Woot! Woot!", "Boo-ya!" and so forth.
4. Wait 20 mins, catch up on Sambora/Locklear/Sheen/Richards divorce tomfoolery.
5. Sport a fancy gown and socks.
6. X-ray
7. More reading.
8. Enter the "robot" room, where I laid on a table under an enormous Transformer/Armatron controlled by the doc. He remotely controls this device to press me into the table.
9. Magically, the table stands up with me on it.
10. Eat some magic crystals and a shot of water, chased by another half glass of plaster of Paris.
10. And so forth....ad nauseum (quite literally)

Good times, good times.

The Bubble Boy

David Blaine "Street Magic" = impressive.

David Blaine "Bubble Boy" = not so cool.

Just caught the last 5 minutes of the much-hyped latest David Blaine spectacle. So, he spends 177 hours in a bubble of water, causing his skin to peel, and voiding his body of its waste through a tube - all for public consumption for those gathered around his oversized Christmas ball which has been home for the last few days.

Then! He gets chained up and attempts to set the world record for holding your breath underwater. The time to beat was 8:58, he got to about 7 mins before he started to flail around like a dying fish...divers jump in, pull him out..doctor comes to the rescue. Meanwhile, the narrator is making Blaine out to be a "hero", for this little piece of "history". Come on...give me a feckin break. He grabs the mike, starts babbling like a baby, crying, thanking everyone for their support. Sad sad sad. Really. Then he is whisked away, probably to his waiting pile of money and hookers from CBS for the ratings pull. But not before the voice-over guy makes some more allusions to Blaine's spectacular strength as compared to astronauts...who can't even walk when they return from space. For shame!

This is Spinal Tap?

Strange but true...for Simpsons and/or Spinal Tap fans.

Did you know that Harry Shearer, who voices Mr. Burns, Smithers, Principal Skinner and a slew of others...is in fact the same person who played Derek Smalls in Spinal Tap?

Strange indeed.

SPAM

SPAM is f$%^in ridiculous. Yahoo has been doing a decent job of filtering most of it into a bulk folder...but when I go to sift through it and delete, I am continuously surprised at the BS people are pushing via e-mail. The subject lines in and of themselves are amusing..just received one message "Polar Hound"..WTF? How is that supposed to entice me to open an e-mail? "What?! A Polar Hound?! I must have won some sort of snow dog of some sort, I better open this e-mail and check. Oh...shucks, it just an ad for Vi@gr-a! and some junk stock, might as well order some!"

Does this actually work? It must or else, the continued effort to flood us with it wouldn't be there. But I mean, WHO exactly is opening these things and thinking it is a good idea to investigate further?

Fresh Hounds! [to appreciate this subtle reference...one must be familiar with Triumph the Insult Comic Dog and the skit in which he interacts with a variety of Star Wars fans waiting in line for a premier...top drawer comedy...guaranteed to make you laugh]

Get into This

Just discovered the Neverending White Lights...basically a studio/songwriting whiz, who has gathered a heavy team of vocalists to guest on each of his tracks. Features, Raine Maida of OLP, Nick Hexum of 311, Todd Kerns, formerly of Age of Electric and others. Some pretty ambient, moving music.

Check out the track "The Grace" ft Dallas Green of Alexisonfire.

http://www.neverendingwhitelights.com/

Peeves

1. Doubling of letters in business names to apparently make more impact, avoid copyright infringements and also to mangle the English language. For example, as seen in Montreal yesterday...JAGUARR Furniture. Not Jaguar folks....JaguaRR! The appeal is obvious...."Yeah, we're thinking of picking up a JAGUARR [couch]".

2. People who misuse LOOSE vs LOSE. ie. Ottawa better not loose in the first round of the playoffs.

3. The fact that it seems nobody in the world who is a proprietor of a restaurant can spell Caesar, as in salad, or the drink. Ok, maybe it's not the owner, but rather, the impish waif tossing cocktails who got her mitts on the dry erase marker for the sidewalk sign...but whatev. Almost everytime I see it...it is some new variation: Ceaser, Ceasre, Caezer, Seizure, etc...ad nauseum.

Old Man

Went to a workshop yesterday afternoon. Sat at a table with 3 other people. Perfect numbers for the activity which would require groups of 2. Stop. In walks this old man 20 minutes late..wanders around before finally joining our now group of 3.

Smells like an old man, unwashed clothing smell, long gnarled fingers with nails like dirty spades. Sits down...makes the simple activity more than complicated.

He spies my coffee in its styrofoam cup. Reaches over and places his dirty finger on the lip of my cup, "Where can I get one of these?", he says.

"Why not just have mine, since you put your dirty finger pretty much right in it?", I think to myself, spinning the cup around and drinking from the opposite side.

He comes back with a styrofoam cup and does a reachover on me and asks, "Can I have some of this?", reaching for my water bottle. I'm like, "There is a table full of water just over there", trying not to sound too abrupt.

THEN, during this particular ice-breaking activity, in which the other group member and I had just been "experts" on Friday night fun and weekend activities, he is assigned the role of expert on summer activities. Seems easy enough, but he then proceeds to inform us that he doesn't play sports or do much of anything besides evangelical work, spreading the gospel far and wide to children all over the area.
For us sinners who had just spoe of patio bars and happy hours, this was an obvious left turn.

Now don't get me wrong, to each his own. Evangelical work and fingers in my coffee aren't really my thing. You can imagine that during this whole episode, I was honestly doing my best not to laugh, holding my lips tight together and trying not to make eye contact with the girl in my group, who I sensed saw this entire thing as utterly hilarious.

And, just for you P Guy, I spent the whole time thinking...."What would Guy do?".

We packed up, and he left us all with brochures on the work of God in our lives, including the young man who pulled out into the road on his motorcycle and was shred to pieces by an oncoming car.

Mmmmmmmmmm....Pi

Student Recites 8,784 Digits of Pi

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060316/ap_on_sc/pi_prodigy

Gaurav Rajav, 15, had hoped to recite 10,790 digits and set a new record in the United States and North America..."I'm kind of disappointed, but I guess I did OK," said Gaurav, a junior at Salem High School.

OK???! Crap, I can barely remember my postal code...let alone 8,784 digits of a non-repeating number.

Gaurav's parents promised him an XBox 360 video game console if he had reached his goal. His father, Jogesh Rajav, jokingly offered to get him "an Xbox, but no game."

Ouch....no game! Bring the pain.

The Academy Is...

I'll say it again...my new favourite band: "The Academy Is". Their new cd Almost Here is fantastic.

Get into it.

Who's Your Yanni?

This hot off the presses....Yanni Arrested For Domestic Beatdown

I find it hilarious that Yanni is arrested for alleged domestic violence...what's he gonna do..play a really mean mixolydian scale on a harpsichord whilst giving "dagger" eyes?

I found this about as likely as being beat down by David Copperfield...who one would imagine would spend most of the time flying around on invisible cables with his mystical stare....oooooh!

Spring is in the air....

A little bit of sun today, a little glimmer of Spring....

Soon it will be "Goodbye" to my winter peeves...people walking on the streets instead of on sidewalks, people parking 3 feet away from any other cars, thus limiting the already limited supply of parking spots, people who shovel their driveways into the street, etc....

However...have discovered some fab new music in the last couple of days....put these bands in your pipe and smoke 'em: The Academy Is, and Goldfrapp.

Simpsons

If you like the Simpsons....you'll appreciate this.

www.spikedhumor.com/articles/17792/Real_Life_Simpsons_Title_Sequence.html

Woooooooooooooahhhh....we're half way there....

From the newswire today:



Bon Jovi Plane Skids Off Runway in Canada
01/21/2006 4:41 PM, AP

An airliner carrying members of Bon Jovi skidded off a runway early Saturday after landing in severe weather.
The Boeing 707 carrying the band and its touring staff overshot the runway at Hamilton International Airport.
A spokeswoman said the 14 passengers and flight crew were arriving from Buffalo, N.Y., where the band played Friday. No one was hurt.
Shows scheduled for Saturday, Monday and Tuesday at Toronto's Air Canada Center were expected to proceed as planned, she said.

You'd think that the band whose breakthrough album was entitled "Slippery When Wet" would have been a bit more careful.

All the Small Things

In an attempt to keep my mind off of my financial woes..I have began taking greater notice of life's little humorous events...

1. Had the pleasure of seeing a vagrant urinate on a street corner in broad daylight today. Yeah, don't bother going into the building...just find a sweet little nook and let 'er rip. Gross. Even more gross, I swear he reached into his own lake of urine to fish out a cigarette butt. Awesome. (There's a Lake Flaccid joke in there somewhere). Even worse...he made direct eye contact with me in my car as he turned around....he kinda looked like a crazy, homeless K-OS (read: he looked like K-OS). I almost expected a little "Crab in the bucket"...but I guess "Urine-soaked cancer stick in my puddle of piss" would have to suffice.

2. Saw someone riding a unicycle downtown today...through the snow and ice. Aren't unicycles dangerous enough?

Get into it.

New Music...New Books

Have been to the "Letters" by Butch Walker since yesterday...and I love it. Don't be shy to get into the track "Maybe It's Just Me".

I am tearing through "Million Little Pieces" by James Frey....and I was greatly enjoying the book...however, I just read a scandalous article online yesterday attacking the veracity of its contents...more specifically, levelling accusations that the truth was greatly stretched/molded/ and/or fabricated altogether. Regardless, it is still an interesting read.

Where's the beef? Here it is:

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0104061jamesfrey1.html

Project Awry

If you appreciate the humor of The Onion, you'll enjoy this:

EVERYTHING THAT CAN GO WRONG LISTED

TheYear Ahead

My New year's Resolutions (Revolutions):




1. Conserve money by no longer buying coffee every day. I'll make my own java at home.

2. Play the guitar more...lots more. The thing I once loved so much seems to have fallen on some distant backburner, and it's a shame. Play music, write music, love music.

3. Read more. Whenever I read a great book, I am reminded of how wonderful it feels to lose yourself in a book. Food for the mind.

4. Make changes. Look for opportunities. Dig out of my financial hole somehow.

5. Get in better shape. Just a couple of pounds. The jiujitsu helps, but I need more cardio and less apathy.

Get into it.